Borderline Grief

I was filled with rage, first Because, I told you 

I warned you

Everyone always leaves
I bargained with you 

Because, I told you 

I warned you 

Everyone always leaves 
I fell into the darkness

Because, I told you 

I warned you 

Everyone always leaves 
I fell into my old patterns 

Because, I told you

I warned you

Everyone always leaves 
I submitted to you 

I tried to avoid your abandonment at all costs at the sake of my own dignity
I saw the girl, the girl I was when I was at my worst

The girl who I never wanted to see again

The girl who gives up her freedom…

The girl with “grade A” abandonment issues
But to this day, you insist

I always say this

That I have been, for years 

And tell me that, “I’m stuck with you” 

But,

You 

Are 

Already 

Gone. 

And now, now

I can’t breathe.
-B. 6-2-17

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