I have this habit of thinking I owe people my life… I put them up high
and I turn into this feeble thing.
Like I can’t live without their love, validation or acceptance and approval.
I let them tear me down
break me, over and over
because they love me
in their sick and twisted way.
Because they would never hurt me.
I’m tired of letting the ones I love hurt me.
I want to be free.
I thought standing up to my father and he who must not be named was gaining my freedom
but they were not nearly the monsters…
the real ones were hiding in plain sight… eating away at me…
feeding me poison
and calling it love…