Seams

I’m barely holding it together I’m hanging on by the seams 
Like an old rag doll 

Who’s had her time 

Seams coming undone 
I need you 

I need you right here 

Not in a little while 

I need you now 

Because I’m coming undone 
-B. 

9-21-17

Explanations 

I hate explaining this When you take it at face value 

The way I feel 

The way this 

My mental illness 

Makes me feel 

Borderline 
I can’t just tell you I’m sensitive because that would not do it justice. 

I have to tell you I feel it in every nerve ending. 

My muscles feel tight. 

I feel on edge as if every inch of me, if you touched me, that I would wince. 
-B. 

9-20-17

I was set free… 

I was set free today 
I thought I would care 

I thought the storm would come 

I thought it would hurt 
But you have done this for too long 

You have torn me apart 

Put me back together 

Too many times 
You pushed me over the cliff 

And you know what? 

I had wings 
And I’m 

I’m okay. 
-B. 

10-9-17

Plucked

Being borderline is hard. Having intense emotional states is hard.

To be highly emotional.

I feel as if every nerve in my body has been plucked like a guitar string, all vibrating in pain, all at once. 
-B.

9-20-17

Cookies 

I used to want to be normal This idea of normal 

This idea my parents put in me 

Society put in me… 
But I don’t think there is a normal 

There are cookie cutters 

Then there’s me 

Cut from my own cookie dough 

With rainbow sprinkles and colored sugar 
Me 

Who doesn’t fit the cookie cutter 
Me who doesn’t feel like everyone else 

Or think like everyone 

Or act 

Or dress 

Or do things the way we were told 
I’m a weird sort of cookie shape

A borderline cookie 

A cookie with a thousand stories 

A thousand cracks 

A thousand scars 

I’m an emotional cookie 

I see things in black and white 

I don’t follow the rules 

I do things at my own pace 

I’m a bit of a broken cookie 

Sometimes bits of me crumble 

I’m not afraid or ashamed of it 

Because I’m not like the others 
If I was like the others 

I’d be boring 

I wouldn’t feel the beauty and the tragedy 

I wouldn’t see it either 

I would be like the rest 

Where’s the fun in that? 
So

I don’t want to be normal 

I just want to be me 

A weird

Rainbow sprinkled and sugared cookie 

Not like the rest… 
-B. 

9-19-17

I’m your daughter!

Broken Again 

By words 

Words that came so easily to you 

That slice me to pieces 
I’m your daughter 

I shouldn’t bare this 

These words should not be mine to bare

These words should not cut me to pieces 

These words should not be abusive 
I’m your daughter 

I should be loved 

I should feel safe 

I should feel like I’m enough 
I’m your daughter 

I’m not your punching bag for words 

I’m not your punching bag for what happened 

I’m not all the pain and torment inside you 
I’m your daughter 

I love you 
I’m your daughter 

Please love me 

Please guide me 

Please be proud of me 

Please keep me safe 
Because I’m your daughter

Always and forever

No matter how old I get…. 
-B. 

9-19-17